Grief Recovery | Main Menu | ||||||||||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
|
|
Workshop/Seminar: |
| What is Grief? |
|
|
Grief is a reaction to loss, any loss. The grief associated with death is familiar to most of us, but we grieve a wide variety of losses throughout our lives: traumatic experiences, divorce, relocation, loss of health and mobility are only some examples. Grief is often expressed by feelings such as anger, guilt, sadness or loneliness. But grief affects us in other ways as well -- spiritually, behaviorally, physically, and cognitively. Bereavement is the way we process grief. Each of us grieves in our own way, affected by such factors as our culture, gender and circumstances surrounding the loss. Every loss has a unique meaning to us. It is best not to think of grief as a series of stages. Rather, we might think of the grieving process as a roller coaster, full of ups and downs, highs and lows. Like many roller coasters, the ride tends to be rougher in the beginning, the lows may be deeper and longer. The difficult periods should become less intense and shorter as time goes by, but it takes time to work through a loss. Even years after a loss, especially at special events such as a family wedding or the birth of a child, we may still experience a strong sense of grief. Since grief is so stressful, it helps to take good care of yourself. Eating and sleeping well, and getting adequate exercise are essential. Sharing your feelings with a close friend, in a journal, through a support group or with a professional counselor can be very helpful. In addition to the resources found here, your local hospice can provide additional information about bereavement services in your community. GRIEF RECOVERY OUTREACH PROGRAMSGRIEF is the normal and natural reaction to any significant emotional loss. While the death of a loved one is considered to be the most painful loss, divorce, retirement, financial and health issues can also be sources of significant grief. Unfortunately grief is often one of the least understood and most off-limits topic for discussion. Often grievers feel totally alone, trying to deal with the conflicting emotions caused by loss. Linda is a certified Grief Recovery Institute® specialist, specializing in grief recovery and life skills to deal with changes in your life. She is the founder of A Promise to Jo…, and consults, one on one and with small groups to provide a safe and structured experience for those who have experienced loss in their lives. The Grief Recovery will change your life! Grief.... is surrounded by so many myths, like- Time heals all wounds Replace the loss Grieve alone Be strong for others Hide your feelings This program is affiliated with, and endorsed by, The Recovery Institute Whenever we face loss, we experience grief. Our reactions are unique and individual; none of us experience grief in the same way. Not only are we different, but our losses are different. Some may grieve a spouse, others a child, parent, brother, sister, or friend. Each of these relationships is unique. Some may have been close; others may have had more tension or conflict. Circumstances may differ. Some losses are sudden, while others follow a prolonged illness. And we may each be able to draw upon different levels of support. As we experience loss, we may need to remind ourselves of these basic facts. Sometimes we torture ourselves wondering why we do not respond as others, even our family members, do. But each of us is different. We may feel anger-at God, towards the person who died, perhaps towards someone who we feel is not responding the way we'd like him or her to respond. We may feel guilt, too. Could we have done something differently or done more? We may even feel responsible for the loss. Other emotions are common. Feelings of sadness, longing for the person's presence, jealousy of others who have not experienced our loss, even relief that a prolonged illness has ended, may trouble us, but they are normal and natural responses to grief. Grief may affect us in other ways. In some, the experience of grief may be physical: aches and pains, difficulty eating or sleeping, fatigue. We may constantly think of the person, even replaying in our mind some final episode or experience. Grief can affect our spiritual selves. We may struggle to find meaning in our loss; our relationship with God may change. I often describe grief as a roller coaster. It is full of ups and downs, highs and lows, times that we may think we are doing better and times that we may think we are sure we are not. The metaphor reminds us that our sense of progress may feel very uneven. But there are things we can do to help ourselves as we experience grief. First it is important to accept the fact that we are grieving. Take time to grieve, to realize that life will be different, and sometimes difficult. We need to be gentle with ourselves. Second, we can learn from the ways we have handled loss before. We need to draw on our resources-the coping skills we have, our own sources of support, and our spiritual strengths. And from earlier experiences, we can learn the mistakes we need to avoid. We do not have to struggle alone. We can share our grief with family and friends. We can seek help from clergy or counselors. Hospices and funeral homes may be able to suggest mutual support groups. And librarians and bookstores can recommend books that can assist us as we grieve. Grief is a registered trademark of The Grief Recovery Institute. Certified personnel use this distinctive mark to announce their association with The Grief Recovery Institute and to distinguish themselves from others who help grievers. While the words grief and recovery may be generic, the phrase Grief Recovery® is unique to the principles and actions outlined in The Grief Recovery Handbook and all other literature and programs affiliated with The Grief Recovery Institute. |
